As if.

Awake quivering

by the caress of an absent

hand you know too well.

Very briefly, the sheets feel like

a dry ice-cold skin

in contrast with

the heart muscle’s heat radiation.

Love is not felt by its beats

but lower in the guts.

I open a window to

listen to the silence.

The absence of sound

invades the room till

an awakening bird

ruffles the magic as

by a windblown.

In an otherwise empty bed,

I mold a second cushion,

to a body shape in my lap.

Trying to revive a dream

as if falling asleep

will preserve the illusion.

When left alone that day

one holds desperately the feeling,

longing for nightfall, waiting

for the dream to continue.

After another restless

night one knows,

only the real experience

will withstand the time.

Le besoin

In English, 
http://lesinterdits.blogspot.com/p/the-need.html

á M. 

Trois heures dix neuf

La nuit a bien progressée.

Je voudrais être

prêt de toi…

… très

prêt de toi,

comme ces quelques

fois,

ton corps enrobé

dans mon giron.

Caresser ta peau.

Etre dans

toi,

très.

Te sentir…

…très,

comme

toi seulement.

Le besoin,

comme toujours

depuis

une éternitée,

déja.

Zapping Zip codes to Zero!?

The friendship with my mirror

ended already a long time

ago anyway

the reflection was one dimensional.

Wrinkles were

not clearly stating the condition of my mind.

Wrinkles ARE!

The color of my skin,

badly influenced by tungsten,

should have made clear an

unhealthy heart. 

This morning a poet died.

Accordingly

I still have another score to go

or if you prefer I still have

two decades

to Go!

to Make myself

useful!

to Do

as much in a timeframe

of seven thousand three hundred days

as I did in the three scores

behind me!

Do I have time enough to find out if

chocolate is bad for dachshunds?

Can I still,

accuse stupidity,

banalize age,

canonize my friends,

dance with a date,

eliminate enemies,

falsify my birth year,

gelatinize my hair,

hard-boil an egg,

immolate before being sacrificed,

jeopardize my whatever reputation,

kiss, kick and knock,

laicize worshippers,

machicolate criticasters,

nightclubbing,

orchestrate my funeral,

pair, panic pardon ... till a certain age,

quickly pair. time is on my side,

randomize all this,

sanctify my love,

theologize with laicized worshippers,

unbutton my trousers myself,

ventriloquize in my coffin,

walk on water,

Xeroxing my days to exponentiation x to survive thee,

yelling my anxiety,

zapping zip codes to zero?

The age score of fear

Someone should sanctify my love.

avant avant

You can find the English translation of this on Page: 'before before' . It was almost impossible to translate because of puns (plays on words).

avant ceci

il y avait autre chose,

je ne me rappelle plus très bien

quoi,

et avant autre chose

il y avait

probablement quelque chose de différent

et avant ça il n'y avait rien

qu'n  vide.

est ce possible qu'avant

de te connaitre, déjà

je te connaissais ?

qu'avant de remarquer

ton existence

je me rendais compte

que tu vivais?

avant?

c'est quoi avant?

avant quoi?

avant moi?

ou toi?

ou avant tout ce monde

que nous avons rencontrés

ou pas?

toi aussi tu a avant

oui,

et eux bien sur.

a tu remarqué

qu'avant de m'apercevoir

auparavant tu savais

que je  vivais?

t'est il venu a l'idée

que tu me connaissais déjà

à ce moment là? 

en ce qui me concerne

je savais qu'n jour

tu serais la.

avant qui ou quoi?

avant quand?

avant!

et toi?

un jour tu te rappelleras

que tu savais

avant.

Time-lag

Something about

lost time,

that was

the idea

this morning,

while looking

in a distant mirror.

The unwrinkled pool

reflects

my memory

in a single glance

suddenly interrupted by

images leaking

out of my eyes.

Those pictures,

the spirit of my existence

kept in my memory as

a time melting pot

of all what I have

heard,

read,

said,

seen

now dripping into

the water.

Made of words

and movements

danced phrases

turn a swelling river

into a swirling ocean

flooding the earth

so they can reach you despite

time-lag.

Last B'Day of the Fifth decade a memorable one.

Dear Friends,

It is always good to reflect on the past year. Some are doing it on the eve of New Year, others at one of the solstices or on an important returning event.

My birthday is one of this returning moments wherein I like to reflect over the past year. Most of all because it's the day that I want to have as many of the people I love around me.

Circumstances bring people into one's life and other circumstances are taking them back to the past for sure without denying them the meaningful role they played and the warm feelings dedicated to them.

This year, due to circumstances we know, I made a choice for sobriety trying to have at least those friends around who are of vital importance since long years or shorter but who are really making the difference.

Chris & Ronny, my everlasting family. Coming here to them is as always coming home in good and bad times and the place where I never have to think if it is the right moment of the year or the right time of the day or the night.

Abraham and Maria always there also, in the background but not a part of a decorum I can assure you.

Allow me to focus on a few persons who have been of an immense support to me the last couple of years but without whom I can't guarantee that I would stand here in front of you as I am today.

Mi hermanitas, Assiyeh and Pato, the pain, the sorrow and the tears that I have unloaded this last half year on both your shoulders and the immense warmth and support you have given me in return... there are not enough words to express you my gratitude. Both of you are around already a certain number of years but everybody should know that without your invaluable presence and continuous encouragements this last month's you made my life a lot more bearable and enjoyable. I thank you both on my bare knees!

Elena, my great friend. Sometimes I don't realize that you are that far away. I miss you here and not only today, but the words you use in your regular mails are the same that you would pronounce and whisper if you were here and this makes me missing you a bit less but still too much.

Stefania, my literary groupie. I could write probably day and night just to read your comments and your incentives to write more and better and always telling me that tomorrow I will laugh with today's sorrow.

Ana. Without words? Not this time. I take this opportunity to let you know how much I value you and the friendship we developed throughout the years. Despite some difficult moments you are my soul mate in a friendship that stands like a rock.

Let me end my Praise saying thanks to those other friends who are here today, Aki, Vero, Alex, Saul, Fernanda, Yared, Catherine and to those who couldn't attend, Angelica, Benno, Andres & co, Senait, Nicola, Angela & Gonzalo and many others.

And I want to mention also all the friends in Colombia, who organized my travel to and into your marvelous country... Ana, Carolina, Ana Carola & Sergio, Erica & Andres, Fam. Rada, Viviana, Neiler, Carlos Martinez, Daniel Lopez, Andrés Toro, Harold Hoyos Goez, Julien Chenet, Paloma Ve, Martha Deyanira Garcia Gonzalez....

What's on the program for the next twelve months?

Step by step restoring what was broken, find back the people I lost and consolidate the relations with the others, mastering my health again, and exploring new job opportunities.

I can only hope that I can count on your help to realize this, which will make my last B'Day of the Fifth decade a memorable one.

I love you all.

Guy.

Kindred Spirit.

For a far away soul mate.

I'm in a state of languor

trying to embrace

the bark of a tree

where tenderness hides

since it slipped out of my words.

It's the only way to catch it back

as it can only hide

on one side.

My arms slowly strangle the tree

as snakes killing their prey.

My tongue tip toes between the

wrinkled wooden rind

accumulated soil

resin tasting.

It's a one soul in

two bodies' friendship

wherein I'm tracing out

the play field

leaving my marks

behind.

I speak, shout,

pledge,

bark, beseech

trees' talk,

depending on your mood

literally

my kindred spirit.